Thursday, November 05, 2009

S'gonna be allright

So the last post had some frustration in it. No question I'm having some issues with the clients, but nothing I can't work through. Last night I took a break headed to an Irish Pub, had a great burger and fries and a tasty brew, and felt my frustration melt away. I got back to the room and watched the premiere of "V", which was just fine. I got some good work done after that, and went into work feeling pretty good.

Yes I crunched more data, and yes I walked a long long way in these loafers that aren't ideal for long walks... and now I'm at the airport getting ready to come home for a long weekend: I'm working from home for half of next week, and the other half will be in N'awlins at our annual company meeting.

Three nice things:
First was listening to a podcast of Ira Glass interviewing Joss Whedon in front of a live audience. It was nerd-vana, and I loved every minute of it.

Second was remembering about Dr Horrible's Singalong Blog. I may need to watch that with Pamela right away.

Third was watching V: See, we KNOW the V's are bad, because we remember it from last time... but Morena Baccarin is just so wonderful as Anna. She was great on Firefly as well (as was Alan Tudyk, who plays an FBI agent... it it too much to ask for a cameo by River Tam - I mean Summer Glau? ;-> ) It's not high art, but it's a good diversion.

One final thing before I board: I went to a pizza place for lunch today where their motto is "Pizza by the CUT!" Which makes no sense so I had to go in. Turns out they make pizza in giant rectangles cut into long strips, and as you go through the line, the guy picks up one end of the strip, the guy lifts the strip and takes a pair of scissors: How much you want? They cut the size piece you want. Pizza... BY THE CUT.

It's a ridiculous gimmick, but the pizza was delicious, so I'm willing to forgive it.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Some Images

1) Waiting in line watching while the woman at the register slowly fishes out her money, then counts it out. The woman in front of me was shifting from leg to leg with impatience, practically snorting with annoyance. So naturally when it was her turn at the register, she handed the person her item, then set her bag down, started fishing for her purse...

PEOPLE: You are buying something. You are sitting in line with nothing to do. Why not get your money out in advance? Is everyone secretly thinking they'll get to the register and the cashier will say "aww honey, it's free day today for you!" And if THAT happened, what hassle it would be to put that money back in your purse.

And I assure you in the above examples, these people were not juggling kids, nor did they have their hands full. Nope - it is just pooooooor planning.

2) I'm finding myself in some "poor communication" situations: At my primary client, during a meeting with higher ups to discuss our strategic plan, I worked through a powerpoint that I believed represented our best work. And at the end of the meeting, my boss pulled from a manilla folder HIS version of the strategic plan, complete with images lifted from my earlier work, but with a direction I had never seen. I work 10 feet from this guy, we've known about this meeting for weeks, I put this thing together, and he was working on a shadow plan in secret? Very strange.

At my Jersey client, I have a problem: I'm managing two of the people working out there, both of whom report to one woman who has caused problems in the past. She has a malicious selective memory, and is over her head and is quick to deflect blame. My "emergency" project was cleaning up after another consultant who ran afoul of her... and I'm trying to keep a lid on things... but it's hard when I get emails that say "CALL ME IMMEDIATELY". So I call, and she wants me to know she's "concerned" about my person. She hasn't done anything wrong, no, it's all going well.... but there's something... something she can't put her finger on. And she wants me to look into it.

Seriously: I'm getting emergency calls about a "Vibe", even though all empirical evidence indicates that everything is going well on the project. Sigh.

Halloween and More

Another impossibly busy weekend, as usual. It was short, with me not getting back until Friday afternoon.

Now kids, I need to confess that I'm getting old. Not the spry thing I once was. And at some point in the last year, I acquired a "condition" - a mild hernia. It very well could have come during my fitness craze, or perhaps while hoisting my children over my head... but the fact remains that there's a bit poking through (not hideously - just a little bump), and decided to see a surgeon about it. So Friday afternoon I met with a guy who had been recommended by two neighbors. Dr Grubbs confirmed that yes, I have not just one, but TWO hernias. The fellow who was along with said "looks like a two-fer!". Dr Grubbs countered "I'd prefer a NO-fer".

He laid the facts out for me: Only 1 of a thousand hernias ever develop into something painful. But the surgery itself has an up to 10% chance of lasting soreness. So he invited me to do the math: .1% chance of pain, which could be operated on as needed, or 10% chance of pain if I pre-emptively operate. Given that the bulge is only cosmetic, and not painful in the least, I'm going for the "wait and see" option. So yay, a surgeon who isn't afraid to turn away business when it's not needed? That's heartening.

Halloween itself was a blast: Pamela was a fighting nun, Bella was a ghost (non-animal), Isaac was a robot, and I was a fancy french lobster. See?



I dare you not to sing "Lobster Face" to the tune of Lady Gaga's Poker Face. I DARE YOU. Anyway, we had a fine evening of candy gathering. Isaac, Zinsser, and I turned in early (8:15), and Pamela and Bella went on to party with the neighborhood until 11. It was very nice to be zonked out with my dog. I love my dog.

Sunday was a day of mostly sitting around recovering from the excitement. We had big plans, but they were for naught. Instead we enjoyed eachother's company. I headed back out to Philly Monday AM, and hightailed it right up to Allentown for some meetings which went into the evening. I got home and decided to veg out with a movie, and watched "The Hangover" which had been positioned as "incredibly funny" by several people. Maybe I was just too tired, but it didn't really do much for me - it felt like a greatest hits of other funnier movies... I was counting the references until I was exhausted.

it was mostly harmless (except in the parts where it was just offensive). Just not the belly laughs I was looking for.

This morning I got up early, ready to visit the client, and discovered the subway and trolley stations were locked. Silly me, I thought "hmm, this entrance is closed, let me find another". I wandered 3 blocks before figuring out: TRANSIT STRiKE. So I hoofed it to the client, who is about 25 city blocks away from my hotel (but very convenient when the metro is running!). I did a chinese lesson, and listened to This American Life.

I love This American Life, because I love imperfect voices telling stories. This week, it started with a woman who kept getting quieter and quieter, until her voice was rattling because she wasn't putting enough air to keep the vocal cords humming... It sent chills down my spine. Sometimes Melissa Block gets to that conspiratorial rattle too. Those are good days. But enough about the craziness of my voice fetish. The point is I walked to work on a beautiful morning, and I got a lot of work done.

Today I was a data wrangler - loading patient records from multiple systems and looking for mismatches. It's actually pretty fun, but it's definitely below my paygrade... but again, it's stuff that needs doing, and I'm glad to help. My boss was in the next room putting presentations together for a big meeting this afternoon. A meeting that got canceled at the last minute because one of the key participants was called into surgery, leaving the other 29 people who had found their way over in the middle of a transit strike without a meeting to attend.

I strolled back, with the growing realization the the loafers I was wearing were not intended for this long haul. I'm nursing some chafed ankles now, and am going to wear my running shoes on my hike tomorrow, and try not to think of 1980's career ladies hustling down the street with white tretorns.

No word on Fort Myers, by the way.

Allright, got a little more work to do tonight, so have a good one.

This afternoon we were supposed to have a couple of meetings...

Monday, October 26, 2009

A grand adventure

First things first: Isaac's lip did heal. He's back in the game. I was seriously freaked out, but now am better. Thank you.

Sunday I decided to blow the kids minds and take them on an adventure... an adventure in public transportation. Isaac has been talking about busses and trains for a year - CAN WE GO ON A TRAIN? WHEN? WHEN? So this weekend, Pamela was out of pocket for most of Sunday doing an insane and extravagant flower arrangement to welcome the new pastor to her church... and I got to take the kids on an adventure with dad. Sunday morning, we piled onto the 6U bus headed downtown at around 10am.

Isaac was beside himself: We're on a BUS? WOW! Bella was much cooler about this, since she's been taking the yellow school bus for a while now, but she was fascinated by the differences - the seats, the advertising, the lighting, the paybox, the transfers... many many questions. I pointed out the city as it rolled past. Once downtown, we walked to the light rail stop and hopped on the train out to the Mall of America. Both Isaac and Bella commented that the train wasn't quite what they expected - it was so QUIET! And low to the ground! They have memories of the big clunky commuter train in Palatine, and the Light Rail is a different beast entirely. Once we got onto the rails and off the street they started to appreciate it more.

We got to the Mall in good time - the total transit was about an hour, so not really the BEST for the kids, but they were well entertained. A whole gang of people coming from an Eckankar meeting got on and were laughing uproariously at two in their part (who were German), eating bananas. Laughing a lot more than the situation indicated, really, but hey, let that light shine. A woman sat with me and chatted up the kids - she had been an 8th grade schoolteacher for 40 years, and knew how to engage them.

Once at the Mall, it was wallets open for fun and full steam ahead. We went through Underwater World, which blew all of our minds: What a great aquarium! They have Sawfish! SAWFISH! I assumed those only existed in Warner Brothers Cartoons. Bella loved the turtles - even the VW Bus sized one. After a quick lunch, we went into the amusement park, and blew through $20 in "points" on a number of rides: Isaac is now tall enough to go on rides with his big sister, and his big sister is now big enough to accept the savage thrills of the kiddie rides in good grace. I got to watch them sitting together on the Big Rigs, the Blues Clues airplane dogs... Though when it came time for the Merry Go Round, Bella insisted on finding an animal that did NOT go up and down. A sturdy camel did the trick, while next to her, Isaac whooped it up on a rabbit that DID go up and down.

We stopped at a cake decorating contest and decorated a pair of cupcakes for later, and then went back through the aquarium again. This time, we spent extra time "playing" with the starfish and crabs, who really didn't have time for us - being busy all inanimate-like. Helping with the Starfish petting area was a nice lady dressed as a zombie surgeon. I mean a surgeon who is also a zombie, not a surgeon who specializes in operating on zombies. We had to clear that up.

The hour of rides home was longer than the ride there, and Isaac was clearly tired. He had a 3 minute liedown with a didda, but then went right into flirting with an early 20-something girl who looked a bit like the kind of people I was hanging out with in my early 20s - punk-lite but with a smile. She was journaling or sketching or something, and having a great time peeking at Isaac. Bella and I had our own cuddle.

It was a wonderful day - and the kids were fantastic: Isaac stayed close and listened, Bella was a great helper, and she was obviously having fun. Apart from the food and experiences, we bought nothing (though I would have totally sprung for a plush Yo Gabba Gabba set if one existed).

Back home, we all relaxed and built up our reserves for the week ahead.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Not again!

I got home safely, if a little late, and was happy to find we were having the neighbors over for a Pizza Party - good company, Jenny as a playmate for the kids, and fooooood. Not much to report on the dinner, BUT... after dinner we were having some dessert in the living room when 2 of the 3 kids burst in yelling about something silly (they wanted to put on a show), and pulling up the rear came Isaac.

Isaac had a red bloody mouth, with blood all over his shirt, and had dripped a red trail from the kitchen, and was screaming.

After the surgery this week, we were absolutely terrified: Pamela picked him up for comfort, I started getting ready for the trip to Children's Hospital... fortunately, JeMae is a triage nurse and was able to help us assess the situation, with some detective work.

As near as we can figure, all 3 decided to bolt from the kitchen at top speed to surprise us, but Isaac tripped and fell flat on the floor. His remaining front tooth gashed into his lower lip, actually breaking through the front just a little. We gave a cool cloth, some ambesol, and some tylenol, and isaac began to calm down and the blood slowed. JeMae took a look and let us know that it WASN'T the surgery site, so that's not a worry - this was a classic "bit lip" and the hole wasn't big enough for stitches, nor were any teeth loose, so we're better off just letting him rest.

So Pamela and Isaac went up to bed, and Isaac slept well. He did wake at 2:30 in pain again, and I gave more medicine...

By this morning, he was back in great spirits and insisted on going to swimming class, and then we went to Bachmann's for quiche (yes the site of the first Dental Emergency)

Around noon, he started shrieking again, and I gave him more ibuprofen and ambesol, and he's napping now.

The poor kid. It's just too sad to mention.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Why

Why is there a "Dr Andrew Weil" brand of granola snack bars? This is not a good thing.

Why am I doomed to love TV shows that are pre-empted at the drop of a hat? Dollhouse is put on hiatus (again) into December, and Fringe is pre-empted by the AL Playoffs? These are shows that give me happiness. Let me have them.

Why did Caesar's Atlantic City run a pre-auth on my credit card for $350 when I was staying for one night, and the room rate was $130? I mean, sure I might order the Beluga Caviar service with Dom Perignon, through room service... Maybe.

Why do Video Slot Machines even exist? Without the satisfying "clunk clunk chunk" of the wheels, the whole exercise boils down to a random number generator. Yes, they have animations, and funny pictures... but what possible fun is there in hitting a button and having it say "NO" or "YES", which is what it basically boils down to?

I gotta go.

Short Ones

1) Bella has taken to putting her favorite stuffed animals into a pillowcase and goes to sleep hugging the sack of them. She explained this to Pamela the other day:

"First, this way I can cuddle them all at the same time. Second, they're warmer in there together, and I threw in a little blanket for them to share. Finally, in case of a fire, I only need to grab the pillowcase to leave, and all my favorite animals are safe".

It reminded me of my "fire preparation plan" for our house growing up: I had a 2nd floor bedroom, and outside my window was a stand of tall pine trees. My plan was simply to throw open the window and leap out and grab a pine bough. I never practiced this, and in retrospect, I think the nearest pine branch was a good 8 feet from my window, which itself was 12 feet above the ground - tracing the arc of the fall, it's most likely I'd have a handful of needles, with the pine bough not slowing my descent in the least. It would have hurt.

But those practicalities mean little to a 2nd grade "fire safety chief", as I was. I had a PLAN.

2) I was able to escape Atlantic City with sanity intact. Walking around that town, even early in the AM, was a bit depressing. The place just reeked of old sweat and cigarette smoke. It was a long day though - 50 miles to Philly, drop Mike at the Airport, then another 60 miles up to Allentown. 4 hours of solid meetings with various groups, nonstop talking and note taking, then BACK to Philly for the evening.

I stayed at the Sheraton this time: While it's geographically closer to the client site, it's certainly not more convenient: From my Marriott, I walk 1/2 block to the Metro or Trolley, and get dropped off between 6 blocks (metro) and 2 blocks (Trolley) from the client site. The Sheraton, it's 6 blocks from the client site. No metro, but no drop-off-closer option. Plus it's $40 more a night, for which I'm not sure it's worth it even if it WAS a faster internet connection....

I did eat at the nouvel mexican place, and Fake Salma Hayek was nowhere to be found. But the food was good as usual. I made an appearance at my primary client this morning (finally), and am ready to hit the air for home. Crazy week, but a good week.

Oh, and no word on Florida yet - might have a call on this next week. My main competition is a guy who has a whole website built to create the illusion that he's a big company with dozens of top quality resources, but it's actually just him. He includes several pages of his "philosophy" on projects. I don't like it.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Atlantic City

Hoo boy. Not really sure where to start. The drive in was gorgeous - a turnpike lined with brightly changing trees, only flattening out at the very end, when the road literally spilled us right into the parking garage of Caesar's on the boardwalk. Wandered through the skyway to eventually find the front desk, in an absurdly large chamber with a 20 foot statue of Caesar Augustus, overshadowed only by the comically large frying pan on a fake fire (advertising some Emeril-endorsed venture) that a 5 year old kid kept leaping at, hoping to clamber up on the handle.

I was given a key to "Suite 2536", and I was struck with two thoughts: 1) Wow, high room!, and 2) the building didn't look that tall from the street. Sure enough, I got into the elevator and saw the floors: 1, 2, 3, 4, 25, 26.... Yep. My scenic vista is of the airconditioning units. Also, the floodlights that illuminate the building are a mere 4 feet from my window. Fortunately blackout shade technology is pretty advanced, and I did have a dark room to sleep in.

After a few hours of work, I met up with Mike in the lobby. Mike was my boss at the last job and helped engineer a soft landing into my current happy place. We have a tradition of having fun in big cities, and when he got a call to do a sales trip to Atlantic City, he called me up and asked if I'd join him - dinner on him. With AC being just 50 miles from Philly, plus hotels very hard to find this week in Philly anyway, I said sure!

We found a row of restaurants - all "brand extensions" of more famous restaurants - Phillip's Seafood, Continental, Buddacon, and heartbreakingly, Sonsie. Sonsie is a beautiful place in the Boston BackBay and has a lot of memories for me (and for Mike, actually). It's where Pamela and I shared breakfast on the morning we learned of Lady Diana's death, for one. Mike saw Stephen Tyler of Aerosmith at Sonsie one time, too. And now it's a "Brand". Sigh. We couldn't bring ourselves to eat there, so we enjoyed the asian-fusion flava of Buddacon, which was pretty ok. They had Talisker at the bar, and I was astonished to see how much they were pouring for $14. Easily a double, if not a triple. One would have been enough, but I had two.

Then it was off to the Casino. Happily they have smoke-free areas.

I'll leave the details out, but I'd just like to have it out there that I went in with $60, and left with $60. My numbers went up and down... but never really did anything. Mike went in with $100, and left with $1,400. That's Mike for you. He walked up to a quarter slots machine, put in a $5 bill, and won $125. He hit 3 of a kind AND a straight at the 3-card poker table. Blackjack was more of a controlled bleeding - up then down then up then down... but you do blackjack for fun, not profit.

At the end, we accidentally ventured into the smoking part of the Casino, and Mike lost $300 in rapid fire at a 3-card poker table run by a sinister man with shiny rings on his fingers... We took that as our cue to escape, and I was asleep before midnight.

This morning, I got up not feeling bad (which if you know anything about evenings out with Mike, you know they usually end with a headache), but desperate for coffee. The Starbucks I had spotted the night before in the Pier mall was blocked by a burly security guard - the mall's not open until 11. What sort of cruel world is it when there's a starbucks that is NOT OPEN at 7:30am for a guy who needs an espresso? I hit the internet and found another one, out in the "real world".

That meant I needed to find a way OUT of the Caesar's complex first. Several false starts kept me going through skyways to other Trump properties - and no signs for "Exit to Street Level". Finally I found a sign for "Bus Lobby" - I figured Busses are on the ground. And yes, it was an exit. I just had to weave through a throng of bleary eyed gamblers who were headed "home". The Starbucks wound up being 3 blocks away, in the middle of an outdoor shopping plaza, and I enjoyed a quad espresso with the entire Atlantic City police force.

It's back to Philly this morning, then straight out to Allentown. I guess some sports team in Philly did a good thing last night - so I expect a bit of mayhem.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Jack o Lantern - The Day

This AM we got up early, carried a sleepy Bella over to the neighbors house (who got her off to school for us), and drove to Children's Minnetonka for Isaac's procedure. Even at 6:30am, everyone was very very nice and chipper, and boy did they have a system for making everyone feel at ease. Lots of open play space for Isaac, and everyone including the nurse, the anesthesiologist, and the Surgeon came by for a talk, and everyone checked the wristbands and verbally confirmed what was going to happen....

At 7:30 we were brought into the operating theater, and they gave Isaac a two stage gas knock out: I held him for it, and watched him smile from the laughing gas, then his eyes roll up with the knock out. They say that some kids fight the knock out and writhe and cry, but Isaac just went out with a little wiggle.

For the record: I would prefer to never be in the position of holding my child as his eyes roll back into his head again and his body goes limp. It was eerie.

The procedure went quickly - just 10 minutes later, the surgeon emerged, gave us the tooth, and told us that in all of his years, he had never seen a kid so peaceful before the procedure, and go under so uneventfully. He said that when they go down smooth, they usually wake up smooth... And 15 minutes later he was awake in the recovery room. We cuddled him for 30 minutes watching PBS kids, while he enjoyed a popsicle.

He was in good spirits coming home, and we watched a few Yo Gabba Gabbas together, while I got caught up at work. By 10, everyone was yawning, and we launched into a collective nap upstairs. An hour later I got up, and went to work on the laptop, and the rest joined me up 3 hours later (!!!). After the big nap, isaac was in a great mood and wanted to play and wrestle, so we did play and wrestle like maniacs. Then he forced me to take him to Target because he wanted "A Racecar". The evening was spent with Lightning McQueen and Big Mac, zooming around the dining room table.

Bella dragged home after 7, having done a full day of school, plus her first day of Synchronized Swimming (our little Esther Williams), and was asleep before Isaac, amazingly. But while they were up, Bella was excitedly telling Isaac "WE HAVE THE SAME MISSING TOOTH NOW!!!" and Isaac was proud of his gap tooth "It's JUST LIKE BELLA!!!"

So it's off to bed now, and I'm hitting Philly tomorrow for a short week. Now that I know Isaac is ok, I feel allright about leaving.

Northwest decided I really needed to sleep in and proactively canceled my 7am flight (on account of weather... which isn't actually coming), putting me on a 10:45 flight instead, which completely messed what I had planned for this short week. But a few deep breaths later, I discovered that all is recoverable. And there's a huge convention in Philly this week, hotel rooms are scarce, so I decided to finally bit the bullet and try out Atlantic City (a mere 40 min drive). I'll write with a full report.