Friday, August 19, 2011

Into Battle

After a wonderful couple of days at the Lake and a productive interlude back at the main client in Minneapolis, I have spent two days deep in the clutches of the darkest monsters in the consulting world.

It started Thursday afternoon: I was headed back to Maryland for a "final" visit with the client out there: We had done work in the Feb to May timeframe, and I've been trying since then to present my findings to the board, who meet for a mere 90 minutes every month. I was bumped from the agenda in June (hours before boarding my flight out there). I was bumped from the agenda in July (the notification came while my flight was in air, so I did NOT cancel that trip - but it was great fun anyway because I got to hang out with Erik in DC).

This week, I got confirmation, then double-checked. Then triple checked. No I was not going to be bumped this time. But as I booked the travel, my spider sense was tingling… all of the direct flights were booked. I had no choice but to connect. What could possibly go wrong?

We landed in Atlanta and headed to the connecting flight, waited a little while on the tarmac, then wheeled back to the gate: BAD WEATHER somewhere in the DC area was preventing our departure. We all deplaned and hung out waiting for news. The weather lifted, but then we lost our crew due to work restrictions, so we were clear to go, but needed to wait for a replacement crew. Finally by 10pm, we had a crew and were in the air… and on the way we circled for an extra 30 min while more storms passed. I had got on in Minneapolis at noon, and landed in Baltimore at midnight.

Further frustrations ensued - a very slow possibly incompetent checkout guy at the car rental place delayed me a further 20 minutes. When I got to the hotel, the door was locked and it took me 5 minutes of banging and calling to get the clerk to wake up and come let me in. My head finally hit the pillow at 2:30 am. And the wakeup call came at 6am.

After the shower, I grabbed my electric shaver and felt it die in my hand as I finished the right side of my face. A quick trip down to the front desk secured me some shave cream and a "razor" to finish the job, and it's a miracle I didn't slit my throat accidentally.

I made it to the presentation and NO I did not get bumped. YES it went off without a hitch. I was running on pure adrenaline, making grand hand gestures and didn't even notice until after I sat down that my cuffs were unbuttoned and had been flapping wildly as I waved at the data flow diagram showing exactly where those hand washing and pressure ulcer statistics were going to be stored for future reporting in my grand vision.

I did not walk out of there with a signed statement of work, but it went very well indeed.

In the midst of all this, I spent over 90 minutes across three conversations with our client in Rochester who has decided that while he loves us and our work, and cannot deny we are delivering for him in a big way, he'd like us EVEN MORE if we were 20% less expensive. Now I have been in meetings with this guy and he is what I will call a "Drone Winner" - he will continue to circle back onto the same point over and over and over and over until the opposition throws up its hands and says "this is not worth fighting for anymore". Through this strategy he has somehow risen to the title of CIO in a major health system, and woe be unto any vendor he begins to negotiate with.

And he has decided to negotiate with me.

I have been standing as firm as I can: I am fully prepared to end this engagement and walk away from this work. But GODS this is exhausting. And not fun. I make a point, he agrees with the point, and he says "but if you were 20% less expensive…." as if that would make my point even MORE valid. And so I have been battling with this robot terminator from the future who cannot be stopped but insists on ENGAGING in the conversation…

So that's in the middle of the crazy travel. And now I'm on my way home, and I'm pleased to announce that the trip home is going WITHOUT A HITCH. Flights are on time, traffic was light, and I even caught up on some sleep. I did have a long layover in Atlanta on the way home, but I got caught up on some email and even did a little creative writing. Plus I got caught up on Alphas and Torchwood too!

Oh, and speaking of BATTLE: TNT, I hope you're not expecting me to be watching Falling Skies next summer. That was some WEAK SAUCE the way you ended that…

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